Grow A Pear
by cpurple
Summary: Fionna is dating Gumball when she realizes he's a little too in touch with his feminine side.
1. Chapter 1

_**This is a short fan fiction I was inspired to write while listening to music on YouTube. I'll update I'd Do Anything for You sometime this week. I hope you guys enjoy this. I'll try to make it as fun as possible.**_

Fionna's POV

Gumball and I were having a picnic in Marshmallow Meadows. I sat next to him, my hand intertwined in his. We had been dating for about three months now.  
"So what's for lunch, Gummy?" I asked, leaning into him.

"Well, I baked a soufflé, and these super cute heart shape cookies!" He pulled out a plate filled with ten pink sugar cookies iced with pink frosting and dusted with silver glitter. "Aren't they adorable?"

"Sure, they're really cool," I answered a little sarcastic. _"Wow,"_ I thought. _"He can be a real girly girl sometimes."_

He lowered the pan slowly. His face fell. _"God, please don't cry"_ I groaned in my head. "What's wrong? You don't like them?"

"No, they're great." I said quickly. "It's just…"

"I knew it!" he sobbed, throwing the pan down. "You hate my baking!" He started to cry even harder. "Nothing I do is ever right!"

"Uggggh. Gumball, calm down." I moaned. I patted his back as he continued to weep. Suddenly, something inside me snapped. "Dear Glob Gumball! Suck it up!" I wailed. Why do I always have to be the mature one in this relationship? He was always freaking out and throwing tantrums if I gave him the least bit of criticism. Sometimes, I wish he could just act like a man.

"What did you say?" he stammered. I almost felt sorry for him. He looked like a whipped puppy. But I remembered all the times he cried like this and how I always ending up comforting him. _"Not this time,"_ I thought.

"I said stop crying like you're three all the time!" I shouted, jumping up and throwing up my arms. "I'm sick of the tantrums, the tears, and the drama! I thought I was dating a prince, not a baby. I'm tired of having to pick you up all the time! Just knock it off!"

His eyes started to water again. "Are you breaking up with me?" he blubbered.

I sighed. "I don't know, Gumball. I just need some time to think about this, okay? I'll see you later." I started to walk down the hill.

"See you at the ball next Wednesday!" he shouted.

"Sure," I responded quietly. "If we're still together then," I said under breath.


	2. Chapter 2

Fionna's POV

After the fiasco with Gumball, I needed some advice. I didn't want to talk to Cake about this. She was Gumball's biggest fan. Whenever I tried to talk to her about his whining, she would argue that he was just sensitive and that was part of his charm. I did not want to hear someone ramble on and one about everything that was great about him right now. So, I headed over to Marshall Lee's house. If anyone was going to agree with me about Gumball, it was Marshall. He was constantly calling him a wuss and teasing him about wearing pink and how much he whined. I definitely wanted to hear that right now.

I arrived outside his house at around 2 pm. If he didn't want to burn up in the sun, he'd definitely be home. I entered the cave and walked up to the little purple house. I knocked on the door and waited a few minutes. Finally, the door opened and Marshall floated out.

"Hey, Fionna," he said, smiling. "Aren't you supposed to be on a date with Gumbutt?"

I giggled. Usually, I would be mad at him for calling Gumball that. But today, it made me feel better. "Yeah, that's what I want to talk to you about. Can I come in?"

"Sure," he answered, floating aside. I walked in and set on the couch. He floated over and sat next to me. "So, what's up? You two having relationship issues?"

"Kind of," I sighed. He looked at me expectantly. "I'm just sick of him always whining and sobbing all the time. Does that make me a terrible person?"

"No way," he protested. "No girl should have to put up with the waterworks every second of the day the way Gumball does all the time. I'm surprised you didn't break up with him earlier."

I looked at him in shock. "Really?"

"Yeah. Fionna, Gumball's smart and everything, but he acts like a girl sometimes. Honestly, I don't think anyone would blame you if you just broke up with him."

"You're right," I answered.

"Aren't I always," he teased. Suddenly, his face lit up. "Hey, you want to have some fun with this break-up thing?"

I was about to say no, when I thought about it. Did Gumball really deserve my sympathy? For six years, he ignored my feelings for him and completely blew me off when I tried to tell him how I felt. He finally agrees to go out with me, and he constantly humiliated me with the drama fest and accusing me of being a jerk for saying the tiniest negative thing. What did I owe him? "What do you have in mind," I asked.

He leaned in. "Okay, here's what we're going to do"


	3. Chapter 3

Fionna's POV

It was the night of the ball, and I was ready to put Marshall Lee's plan into motion. I out on a short, sleeveless purple dress and headed off to the Candy Kingdom. When I arrived, I immediately went to find Gumball. He wore his usual pink attire. "Hey, Gumball," I called.

He turned around. "Hey, Fionna. How have you been? Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure," I followed him into the corridor and stood next to him. "So, what's up?"

"Well, I thought about what you said on our last date…" he started.

"You did?" I said hopefully. Mabye he was going to apologize for acting so immature. Maybe I should go find Marshall Lee and call of the plan. Maybe he would say sorry for…

"And I forgive you." he finished.

I snapped back to reality. "You forgive _me_?" I said in disbelief.

"Sure I do. It's not your fault that you went off like that. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I wasn't willing to put up with a little whining every now and then, right?"

"Yeah, I guess, but when I yelled at you…" I said quickly.

"But," he interrupted. "You're going to have to try and stopping doing that. No one likes it when people throw tantrums like that. It's kind of embarrising to have your girlfriend throw a fit. You have to stop that."

I stood there, mouth a gap. Was Gumball lecturing _me _to stop whining? A day hadn't gone by when I didn't have to deal with Gumball sniveling and moaping because of something someone had said. Was he really lecturing me?

"So we're good, right?" he said, clueless of my anger and disbelief.

I put on a fake smile. "Yeah, we're good."

"Great," he responded. "Well, I have to get back to the party. See you later."

He walked off to the ballroom, and I continued to stand there, trying to process what had just happened. Just then, Marshall Lee floated over.

"Hey, I saw Gumball come talk with you. The plan's still on, right?" he asked.

I smiled wickedly. "It's still on." I responded.


	4. Chapter 4

Fionna's POV

The plan was all set to go. The party was in full swing, and Marshall had sent everything up. Marshall Lee floated by. "You ready for this?" he said, smiling.

"Yeah," I responded.

"Great, let's do this."

Gumball walked onto the stage in the huge ballroom. "Excuse me? Can I get everyone's attention please?"

Everyone quieted down and turned to look at Gumball.

"I hope everyone's having a good time tonight. We have some surprise special entertainment for you guys tonight. Apparently, Marshall Lee's band would like to perform a song for you tonight. So put your hands together for them."

Everyone started to cheer as the curtains opened up. Marshall's band waved to the crowds. I stood at the mic.

"Here we go," I sighed. "Hey, you guys!" I shouted. Everyone in the audience cheered wildly. "This is for my _ex_-boyfriend, Prince Gumball!"

I saw him look up, confused. I laughed as Marshall Lee started to play. I took a deep breath and started to sing.

"_Last night I had enough of you, I put on the brakes  
And I could tell you took it hard, it was all over your face  
That you were slipping and flipping, but here is the sitch  
I signed up for a man, but you are just a bitch_

I saw Gumball gasp in shock. It was Marshall Lee's idea for me to this song tonight to show Gumball just what I thought of him. By the look of things, he got the message.

_You should know that I love you a lot  
But I just can't date a dude with a vag  
When we fell in love, you made my heart drop  
Then you had me thinking 'bout you nonstop  
But you cry 'bout this and whine about that  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back  
Yeah, I think you're hot, I think you're alright  
But you're acting like a chick all the time  
You were cool and now you're not just like that  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back_

I continued to sing as Gumball stood there, babbling and confused. Many of the people in the audience looked just as surprised as him.

_When I first met you (Panties dropping!)  
Everytime I saw you (It was on and!)  
One day you asked if we could just talk  
And that's the reason why I'm walking  
If I am honest, I'm just not hooked on your phonics  
I'm not trying to be rude or crude  
I just wanted one thing from you  
And you got confused_

I jumped off the stage and started to walk towards Gumball. The audience had gotten into it and were dancing and clapping. I walked up to Gumball and smiled devilishly. He glared at me as I continued to sing.

_You should know that I love you a lot  
But I just can't date a dude with a vag  
When we fell in love, you made my heart drop  
Then you had me thinking 'bout you nonstop  
But you cry 'bout this and whine about that  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back  
Yeah, I think you're hot, I think you're alright  
But you're acting like a chick all the time  
You were cool and now you're not just like that  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back_

_When you grow a pear, you can call me back  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back  
Grow a pear, you can call me back  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back  
Oh, grow a pear, you can call me back  
And no, I don't want to see your mangina  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back_

Gumball turned even pinker as he blushed with embarrassment. I laughed and stalked off, hopping back on the stage and singing the end of the song at the top of my lungs.

_When we fell in love, you made my heart drop  
Then you had me thinking 'bout you nonstop  
But you cry 'bout this and whine about that  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back  
Yeah, I think you're hot, I think you're alright  
But you're acting like a chick all the time  
You were cool and now you're not just like that  
When you grow a pear, you can call me back."_

Everyone broke into wild applause as I sang the last note. I waved at the crowd as the curtains closed. I turned to Marshall Lee and the band. "That was great, you guys!" I shouted.

"You were awesome, Fionna!" Marshall Lee laughed.

"Thanks!" I said, as I walked backstage. Just then, I ran into Gumball. He looked furious.

"What was that all about, Fionna!" he shouted angrily. "You totally humiliated me in front of all my subjects! What did you even mean with that whole song?"

"Figure it out," I laughed as I walked off, leaving him there looking confused.

_**Hope you guys enjoyed my fanfiction! I promise I'll get back to I'd Do Anything For You sometime soon! Please rate and review!**_


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